A phrase I dislike!

     A post once every three months...wow, I am on a roll!  I have been so busy over the last couple of months, although writing has been on the back of my mind for that long.  I love writing...it allows me to vent without caring what anybody else thinks.  I hear this phrase a lot(not so much anymore) but I heard it the other day and it just got under my skin: Welcome to parenthood!
     Seriously, I have been a mom for 5 years...I am NOT a new mom!  To me this phrase almost makes the person sound better because they have experienced it before you did...so what!  Who cares when we experience different parent only things.  For example, I have been a mom for 5 years and I finally got a mom brain last weekend and completely got times wrong for a friends birthday party.  I was completely shocked, I am naturely a very organized person so I hadn't experienced that yet...but when I got to the party I was told "Welcome to parenthood"  like I was a new mom!
     If you think about it...everybody is a new parent several times in their life!  When your oldest starts walking, starts talking, goes to school, becomes a teenager, graduates and moves out!  All those experiences with your oldest child makes you a new parent.  After that with your other children your not a new mom anymore!  I don't think we should tell anybody that...even if they are brand new parents....they now they are inexperienced they don't need reminding.  We should be supporting each other and say "I just did that," or "you know what helped me, when I did that."  And when parents have child number 2 they are NO longer new parents. 
     It doesn't matter how adults become parents, if they have the desire in their hearts then God will help them become parents.  Just because some parents and children are not blood related that doesn't take away the different phases of being a parent.  Those of you who have never adopted...those children's birth certificates are changed the day the adoption is finalized!
     No one wants to hear "Welcome to Parenthood," people know the day they get pregnant or adopt a child their world has just changed...they don't need us parents shoving in their faces that their experiencing all these things.  I knew the day Silena was placed with us that my world had just been changed.  I loved having all those mom experiences...in fact I still cherish them...it reminds of the blessings God has given me:)
    

Since it has been almost exactly 4 months since my last post...I should catch everyone up with what has been going on.  We have been so busy since Feburary that is why I haven't blogged. 
We felt a strong tugging on our hearts toward foster care.  So we started the paperwok and application process again and will be official foster parents on Monday.  We just really felt that if God wanted to grow our family that way that we were stopping him from being able to do his work.  We are licensed for newborn-1 year olds.  We want to be able to experience what it's like to have a baby!  We are very excited to be able to minister to children through this way.
We also took over the youth ministry at our church.  Which, Craig has had a strong desire for since he was a teenager himself.  We absolutely love it and just completed a huge fundraiser for the youth that will help them go to camp.
We are getting over a VERY rough period with Silena(that is a post in itself).  Through prayer and therapy her behavior has done a complete 180 and I now feel like,for the first time, in a long time...we are connecting as mother and daughter.  She has become my favorite person(besides Craig) to hang out with. 
We also took the huge leap of putting our house on the market.  We would really like to move and get a little bigger of a house.  We have found one that we have completely fallen in love with and now all we need, to do, is wait for ours to sell.  We would really like to be able to take on multiple foster kids at once and the only way to do that is to have a bigger house.  This house was never our permanent plan and the house we are in love with, we can completely see ourselves in for a very long time.

So please agree with us in prayer for the following:
-youth group growth
-a foster child who needs our love
-our house to sell
-everything to work out with the new house
-continued guidance in parenting Silena

New Revelation from James!

     I have a week left in my study on the book of James.  When I read this book right before Christmas I don't remember looking at it with such clarity..it's amazing what God can and will reveal when the time is right.
     The lesson yesterday was on patience...something we all need constant work on!  Something I read really struck a chord with me: "You can't rush God. You can't push Him. You can't pull Him.  You can't tug Him or taunt Him.  If He has a mind to linger right were He is, you can't budge Him one inch.  You can, however, try to go without Him; but, chances are, you'll come back because, if you really have a heart for God, you'll be miserable beyond his blessing,"quoted from Beth Moore. 
     Wow, for some reason a light bulb went off when I read this(as much as it surprised me I know it didn't surprise God).   It doesn't matter how bad we want something or when we want it...it's up to God to decide when we are ready for those things to happen.  Everything has to fall in place at a certain time in order for his perfect plan to occur! 
     The other thing that really struck a chord with me was this: "A person has hardly begun to have a real fight on her hands until she starts serving in her full-throttle giftedness and effectiveness.  She who proves a threat earns an enemy you can bet will do everything he can to make her sorry," again quoted from Beth Moore.  Then the other thing that goes with that is this: "Here is the sobering truth about the nature of trials in the life of righteous persons, that God allows them to be tested in order to prove their faith...In some ways their endurance proves the Lord's boast in them,"quoted from Kurt Richardson. 
     Isn't that remarkable? What I got from this is the fact that we will face trials, when we are in the middle of that "fire" we can bet we are doing exactly what God wants us to do...keeping our faith and depending on him to get us through that fire alive!  But, isn't it amazing, that it seems that in the middle of that trial things seem to get worse?  That's because the enemy knows we are operating just the way God wants us to and he will do anything in his power to shake us from our rock!  In no way, can we let the enemy win...we must stand firm on our rock and know that God is doing this to refine us and develop our perseverance, patience and faith:)

James

     We went to an amazing church while on vacation!  It was a baptist church with an average membership of 14,000 people...yep, that's right!  While there they had a cute little book store and I found a new Beth Moore bible study.  It's on the book of James.
     Since starting the book of James it has now become my favorite book.  It has a lot of insightful messages in it and asks us to do some very hard things.  From my commentary in my bible: James 1 tells us to act out our faith.  James 2 reminds us to treat everyone the same and follow with deeds.
     Acting out faith can be a very hard thing.  For example, believing for more children when the doctors here on earth say it is not going to happen.  Faith says, it can, because God tells us to be fruitful and multiply, anything is possible and ask and you shall receive.  Part of faith is believing when you feel like everyone thinks your crazy.  Another example, believing that a house you fell in love with will stay on the market until your house sells!  Believing this, isn't not knowing reality, it's believing God for something and knowing that if the doors open then it's meant for you.
     In James 2 the first half of this chapter is on favoritism.  Which I didn't even know was here..even though I just read this whole entire book..I must have missed that point!  That we are to treat everyone the same, even if they just walked off the street or if they just donated a million dollars to the church.  It doesn't matter where they came from or what they look like, everyone deserves the chance to contribute and have a say.
     The second half of James reminds us that faith without deeds is useless.  For example, buying a bigger house when there are going to be 2 empty rooms, but knowing if that is the house you are meant to buy that God has a plan and you have to have faith for that plan.  Don't worry about the why or the how, but having faith for the unseen and following through with what God has laid on your heart.  No matter what we are having faith for we have to follow it up with deeds.  We can't believe God to provide for us and then go out and get a loan, or believe God for change and then say it's not going to happen.  It doesn't matter if our friends and family think we are crazy as long as we following through with what God wants and asks from us that is all that matters:)

Philipians 4:13

     Many of us know this verse by heart: I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.  Well, I learned another great aspect to this verse while in Florida.  The Disney race is so big that they also had a health and fitness expo the whole weekend.  One of the vendors was called TEAM 413...can you guess why?
     This team is based on Philipians 4:13...that you can do anything you want and accomplish anything you put your mind to because we have God as our Lord and Savior.  This is the prayer they have come up with...that I thought I would share:

God,
Give me the courage to run the race.
Help me to persevere as you taught us.
Grant me the strength to finish strong.
Honor me with your presence on my journey.
Allow me to be a GraceRunner this day.

Oh Lord...
One more breath...
One more step...
One more mile...
FINISH LINE...

This is my prayer.
I can do all things through YOU who strengthens me!
Amen.

I think this can apply to anybody...no matter if you are a runner or not:)

Dreams come true!

     I have grown up with my Dad running...getting up on my days off of school to bike along side of him.  Which I thought was cool, until I was a teenager, and getting up early was complete torture.  Then right after we got Silena I decided to start running myself.  I found the joy in it and it gives me the same adrenaline rush that dancing does.  About two years ago when I started getting the Running Magazine I found this awesome race that I wanted to do: Walt Disney World Half/Full Marathon.  I instantly told my dad and my original thought was to do the full marathon. 
     However, after taking last year to figure out my knee problems I discovered that there would be no way possible my knees are capable of that distance.  So I compromised with the half marathon, which is still a huge accomplishment. 
     So we leave for Florida, check into the condo and go to the running expo and pick up all of our stuff.  We assumed our race was on Sunday so we went for a small run Friday night and we were planning on taking Saturday off.  After putting Silena to bed Friday night Craig, Mom, Dad and I sit down to play cribbage and something caught my eye.  My commerative pin said that our race was on Saturday NOT Sunday...I said something to my dad and we checked all our information we just got and sure enough our race is Saturday.  Although our paperwork said Sunday!  Crap...now we have all this stuff to get ready and it's already 10:00pm and we have to get up at 2:30!
    Praise God that he pointed that out to me otherwise we would have missed it!  This was the coolest race I have ever done.  My dad and I joined 27,000 other runners in the most magical place in the world.  There were disney characters along the route, local cheerleaders and bands, and many drink stations.  Around mile 6 my knees started hurting (I am sure because of our run Friday night) and around mile 9 they were getting painful, so we walked/ran the last 4.  The last mile seemed to go on for days, but as soon as I saw the finish line it was like God gave me a new surge of energy and I sprinted to the finish line.  Tears and all...
     It's an amazing feeling when you accomplish something big, not only accomplish it, but it's been something you have dreamed about.  It was just as magical as I imagined and getting to experience that with my Dad was awesome!  Thank you Lord for the strength:)

Psalms!

     Today's devotion come from Psalm 118:1...Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever.
     Good thing, right?  Good thing he loves us despite our mistakes...good thing he loves us despite when our kids throw tantrums over the stupidest things.  He loves us even if we make stupid financial decisions and he loves us when we don't love ourselves.  His love is so big for us that he constantly does good things for us despite how we act or what we say.
     We just have to remember to give thanks to him no matter what...even if the trial we are going through is a tough one there is always something to be thankful for! 

This will be my last devotion for the next two weeks!  My family and I are off for a vacation...so I will talk to you in a couple of weeks:)
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